How to Survive a Breakup: A Year in Pictures

This is the first 54 seconds of my 1-second video challenge of 2015. Each second represents a different day. I’ve skipped a few days but have been doing a pretty good job keeping up with the challenge. Enjoy.

I also thought it would be cool to chronicle the last year in pictures. I’m starting my year at April 1, 2014 and working forward. A year ago, I was blissfully happy. I was in a great relationship with a man deeply loved. We had been together for 2 and a half years and never had an argument. We never even raised voices at one another. I was certain I had found the man with whom I’d spend the rest of my life. Things at work were also awesome. I was on THREE top paper panels at the 2014 Western States Communication Association conference. Here I am with Ann Johnson talking to students at WSCA:

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Expect the unexpected. In mid-April, my boyfriend broke up with me. Total shock. I didn’t see it coming at all. I was totally devastated. I took a teary-eyed selfie to mark the occasion.

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Flying solo meant I could spend more time with my dog Bella. Here we are at Laurel Canyon dog park. You might also notice that I decided to let my hair grow.

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In the midst of my post-breakup depression, I decided to start building things and revamping my apartment. I actually BUILT this workstation. Cut the wood. Painted it. Put a gloss on it. Everything. The project reminded me that I was capable of creation, that I could be productive and make beautiful things. I needed that reminder.

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I also had braces throughout 2014. Nothing like being 38 and newly single and having to wear braces. I OOZED sex appeal.

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By the time summer started, I donned a top knot. After a decade or two with the same boring, conservative hairstyle, it was definitely time for a change.

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I spent most of the summer re-doing my apartment. Above= before, below= after.

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Other days were spent poolside with awesome friends like Kristen Bitting.

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My hair was really starting to get long by mid-summer. It took a lot of work just to slick it back in a knot. Aw, the perils of the a Jew-fro.

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At the end of summer, my friend Phil and I traveled to Austin for Last Splash, which, under Rick Luisi’s management, has turned into an utter waste of time. Vacationers and party-attendees have to find their OWN way to the lake. WTF? And the party is small. RIP, Splash. I also managed to get my first ulcer in Austin. BUT, despite all that BS, Phil and I managed to have a genuinely good time. I bought a bunch of great clothes from By George. Oh, By George, how I miss thee!

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Did I mention my hair was getting LONG? And my top knots were getting wilder.

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My hair got so long that I finally decided to cut it all off. Maybe I’d attract more men with short hair. So I went with this haircut. It’s one of my all-time favorite haircuts. I hated it at the time because I wanted to go super short. Stupid Ragan.

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I spent another Halloween as Sexy Jesus. This year, I got to troll the evangelicals while wearing my costume. I also made out with a hot guy on Halloween night. He was dressed as a sexy angel. This was my first kiss since Zack broke up with me.

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Still feeling insecure about my hair, I decided to go SUPER short. A sexy, selfie photoshoot came after the haircut. After all, I had to make new Grindr photos.

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In December, I went to visit my sister and two infant nieces in New York City. The best time I had all year was when my niece Emerson fell asleep on my chest. Hanging out with my sister and her kids made me realize just how much I want to be a father. I also know that I don’t want to do it without a husband. First comes love, THEN comes marriage, THEN comes the baby in the bay carriage. At least for me.

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When I returned to West Hollywood, my mom came to visit. She’s my favorite person in the world. There’s nothing my 69-year-old mother loves more than to give me dating advice. “You’re going to meet somebody on the COMPUTER,” she likes telling me. Ok, Patti Stanger.

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I had a potluck for Christmas dinner. Yes, all my friend are ridiculously good looking.

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In January, my buddy Cory and I went skiing.

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Right around this time, I decided I’d start growing a beard. That meant I had to come up with a new crop of Grindr photos. Since the breakup, I had only gone out on one date and kissed one guy. I’m Phase 4, terminally single.

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Being single has its up-side. I get to go out to bars on the weekend and drink until I can’t remember my name. Somehow, that all seems much more dignified when doing it with a beard.

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I spent the last weekend of March at Cory’s birthday. It’s been a tough but empowering year. Sometimes you have to be your own superhero.

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